


Words Get In the Way

by angelskuuipo



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Early Work, F/M, GFY, POV First Person, Past Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-12
Updated: 2014-06-12
Packaged: 2018-02-04 10:32:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1775926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelskuuipo/pseuds/angelskuuipo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Words have power.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Words Get In the Way

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little bit of angst that I couldn’t get out of my head. Un-betaed. Any and all mistakes are mine.
> 
> Originally posted 9-2-08.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The downside of knowing someone so well, of being that close to another person, is that you know exactly what to say to hurt them the most.

Whether you meant to or not.

It was early morning and I’d only had a couple of hours of sleep when it happened. The dog had gone crazy and knocked something over. It was loud and jarring and so not what either of us needed to be woken up by that morning.

The words slipped out without a thought. “Don’t hit him,” I mumbled. Never even occurred to me that he’d take it the way he did. That he would think I would think he’d ever hurt me or the dog. I know he wouldn’t. But I also know that he’s been stressed lately and having his sleep interrupted was just icing on a shit cake of a week. He’s been known to swat at our canine child on occasion when he gets too noisy. I just didn’t want them getting into it when I’d been up until the ass crack of dawn and was trying to finally catch some ‘z’s’.

For the next three days he barely spoke to me. I knew something was bothering him, but I didn’t want to push. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore. He wouldn’t look me in the eye and he’d barely touch me. Enough was enough. Imagine my devastation when he told me what was bothering him.

Christ on a crutch, could I have hurt him anymore if I’d slid a knife into his back? Three little words managed to bring up shit he’s spent most of his life trying to forget.

And there’s absolutely no way to make it right.

I apologized; of course I did, but saying ‘I’m sorry’ can’t make them go away. Nothing can. He has to live with the memories I unthinkingly stirred up and I have to live with knowing that I made him think that I thought he was abusive.

He has never lifted a hand against me and has only raised his voice to me in anger a handful of times since we’ve been together. He treats me like a fucking goddess and I am the luckiest woman on Earth.

There’s no way I can take back what I said and there really isn’t a way for me to explain why I said it. Don’t even know if I really know myself. We’ll get through it and get back to normal, but there’s always going to be this little bit of hurt between us now.

The old adage of ‘sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me’ is so much horse shit. Words are weapons of the most lethal kind if wielded properly. I just can’t believe that I was the one wielding them against someone I love more than anything. It was careless and cruel.

I guess all I can do is show him that I love him and trust him. That other old adage of ‘actions speak louder than words’ is a good one, because sometimes words just get in the way.

-30-


End file.
